I am the person who does not really read anything unless it is going to give something back. Personal growth, leadership, self-love, building a healthy relationship with myself, growing in my faith, and figuring out how to show up emotionally as a mom — how to discipline with love, and why our own past matters so much in motherhood. If it helps me grow, I am in. If it does not, I usually pass.

So, it might surprise you that some of the biggest turning points in my life did not come from a book. They came from a chair in a room, listening to someone else tell the truth about theirs. Keynote speakers, workshops, and retreats have all shaped who I am today. The ones that stuck with me were never the most polished. They were the speakers who were honest about the moment their life shifted — the hard season, the realization, the decision to do something differently. Hearing someone else name their turning point gives you quiet permission to look for your own.

The moments that still move me forward

The conference day I remember most right now is GRIT, a women's event hosted by the Wetumpka Chamber of Commerce. One speaker after another shared her journey and how she pushed through. Rachel Joy Baribeau's keynote is the one that stayed with me. Three years later, I remember two things: first, how sweet she was, and second, how she talked about what lets your soul feel full, and about your ride-or-dies, the people you would call on the day you are at your most breaking point.

That question has followed me. The names I would have said that day are not all the names I would say today. Some have stayed constant, like my mom, my sister, and my husband. Others, over the past couple of years, have shifted from that inner circle to an outer one. As hard as that is to see, it is exactly what I heard from her: those three to five ride-or-dies are some of the most important cheerleaders you will ever have in your life. That is the message that remains from her keynote. And yes, I absolutely read her book afterward, and it shifted parts inside of me.

The retreat that shaped me most as a participant was with Eyia Retreats, led by Kat and Theodora, with a focus on the Art of Living Well. It was a once-in-a-lifetime trip, right before my world shifted into motherhood. I loved every bit of sitting in the olive groves, reflecting in my own voice on the shifts in my life and what my days would need to look like for me to love every single one of them.

I also walked away with something I did not expect. People I was meeting for the first time spoke words into me like creative, different, determined, and thoughtful. They had no idea how much they gave back to me. In the months before, I had been called inflexible, difficult, too particular, and not understanding, and those labels landed on the very parts of myself I thought were loved about Becca. That retreat became a continuation of my healing journey, a way back to knowing the parts of Becca she loves showing up as every single day.

It followed a few sessions with the pastor at my home church, who shared with me that sometimes we have to shift where relationships take up space in our life, for one reason or another, and that does not mean the process is not painful. The word pruninghas been a thread ever since: looking honestly at my life and pruning away what does not help at the core, so what matters most has room to grow.

Creative workshops that gave back to me

Not every growth moment has come from a stage. Some of the most restorative ones have come from creative workshops: places where I did not have to be structured or have it all figured out. I could just show up and watch something I would love to come together, one step at a time.

Years ago, Bonnie with LilyPad Designs hosted workshops about once a month. She had the door hanger cut-outs ready, and you showed up to paint them. I made a commitment to myself that whenever it worked into my schedule, I would go. It was easy on the budget, and it gave me a place to be around others and get creative with paint and ribbons. Funny fact: a close friend and co-worker came to pick me up one day and knew I was moving the second she saw there was no door hanger on my door.

In the last couple of years, I found Gather & Bloom, a floral boutique that offers workshops. I have always loved flowers. My granny loved roses and taught me all about her rose gardens and how to simply enjoy the beauty of a bloom. Gather & Bloom became a place to browse among friendly faces, first on walks with my puppies and now with my little one. But the time I have spent in its workshops, as intentional self-love time, has given back to me in endless ways. I showed up to one having just found out I was pregnant, and it let me breathe and focus on creating. Five days after my little man came home from the NICU, I went to another, and again it gave me space to breathe and make something I would get to enjoy for weeks to come.

The fun has also come from the conversations and getting to know the people who lead them. Cait with A La Cait Florals, who teaches pressed floral art and wreath making, is so creative, and our conversations were always uplifting. Rebekah Harrison Fine Arts offered workshops where we designed a small bloom vase and then painted that design. She has since painted countless commissioned pieces for me and for gifts, and I love the birth month flower designs she has painted for me. My favorites are always the design workshops with Lauren, the owner and lead floral designer at Gather & Bloom, because she shares the stories behind the flowers. They have been some of the most life-giving moments I have had over the years, and she is now collaborating with me on a workshop series called The Bloom Series.

The retreat I led that gave back to me

The Rediscover Your Intentional Self Retreat was another retreat that gave back to me in so many ways, and that surprised me. When you are the leader, the one who pulls everything together and organizes every detail, you do not always expect to get something out of it yourself. But this retreat gave me time to unplug and go deep into the areas of life that give back real tools. I came away with fresh self-relationship reflection on who I am and how I want to show up.

The retreat also included a focus on authentic leadership. Our guest speaker shared about his leadership over a 42-year career and the books that have helped him along the way. That keynote speaker was my dad. The books were not new to me, since he has given them to me as Christmas presents throughout my life, but I heard them from a different perspective this time. Part of that came from our participants' questions, and part came from the fact that I had entered motherhood and was thinking about how I want to teach my little one about leadership in his own life.

This is a retreat Stacked Intent will definitely do again. And it reminded me of something worth remembering as a participant, you can give back to the retreat or workshop leader just as much as they give to you.

Every one of these experiences taught me the same thing. What I hear only changes me when I carry it home and live it.

Why inspiration alone is not enough

Here is the plot twist, though: inspiration is not the goal. Inspiration is the spark. And sparks fade fast.

Most of us know the feeling. You leave an event fired up, full of ideas, maybe a little teary. You promise yourself this time will be different. Then Monday happens. The notes go in a drawer, the kids need dinner, the inbox fills up, and within a week life looks exactly the same. That is not a character flaw. It is just what happens when inspiration is never given a place to land.

The difference between a good event and a life-changing one usually is not the speaker. It is what you do with it afterward. That is why every keynote, workshop, and retreat I lead ends with a take-home tool, not just a takeaway — a values statement, a boundary script, a personal reset routine, a plan you can start the next day. Knowing is not enough. Growth lives in the doing.

The One Line, One Step practice

Whether you are heading to a conference keynote, a weekend retreat, a church women's event, or simply pressing play on a podcast, this practice turns what you hear into something you live.

• Before: set one intention — finish this sentence before you walk in: "I am hoping to walk away with ___." Maybe it is how to stay calm when your kids push back, how to stop losing yourself in a busy season, or how to feel less anxious about money. Going in with a question gives your mind something to listen for, so you hear the message meant for you instead of trying to absorb everything.
• During: capture one line, not every line — listen for the one sentence that stops you. You will feel it: you lean in, your throat tightens, or it stings a little because it is true. Write it word for word, and next to it write why it hit you. One line you remember, and use is worth more than ten pages of notes you never reread.
• Within 48 hours: take one small step — choose an action you can finish in ten minutes or less. Send the text. Have the conversation. Write the boundary out. Set up the budget category. Then stack it onto something you already do every day — your morning coffee, school drop-off, or prayer time — so the new habit has somewhere to live.
• At 30 days: check in with yourself — put a reminder on your calendar with your one line written in it. When it pops up, ask: Did I use this? What changed? What needs adjusting? Even better, tell a friend your line and ask them to check in with you.

This is the same rhythm I build into every retreat. Before we meet, there are journal prompts and a welcome survey, so you arrive with an intention. During, there is a workbook and time to reflect, not just listen. After, there is a 30-day group chat and a follow-up check-in, because growth sticks best when someone walks beside you.

Why small steps matter so much

Every time you follow through on something you told yourself you would do, you strengthen the most important relationship you will ever have — the one with yourself. That self-trust is what carries you into the next season, the next hard conversation, the next hard day. One honest moment, turned into one small, repeated action, is how real change happens.

You do not need to attend more events or finish more books to grow. You need to carry home one thing and practice it. So, the next time you sit in that chair, go in with an intention and come home with one line and one step.

If your workplace, professional organization, HR Wellness Conference, Chamber, church, women's group, or team is looking for a speaker or planning a retreat, Stacked Intent would love to walk beside you. Every session is built so people leave with something they can use the next day. Learn more at stackedintent.com/speakingengagements.

It's about the journey, not the destination